Watersports Fantasy: Why do some people enjoy being urinated on?
We ask Carla Blunt why golden showers can really get some individuals going.
“Some people see it as a beautiful connection, a way to see more of their partner and to be more intimate,” says Carla Blunt, sex therapist and author of numerous articles on the subject of fetish sex.
Carla isn’t talking about a long, slow, deep, soft, wet kiss; she’s talking about urophilia, also known as ‘golden showers’ or ‘watersports.’ This describes a sexual variation where people derive pleasure from urine or urination. According to Carla, it is “arousal associated with smelling, feeling, or tasting urine, as well as urinating on someone or being urinated on by someone else, otherwise known as piss play”
Golden showers are a hot topic at the moment and received plenty of ink recently.
While people indulging in watersports is not as rare as you might think, people don’t talk about it much because we have a culture that is still a bit prudish about sex. And if there’s anything we’re more prudish about than sex, it’s our bathroom habits. Piss play does a brilliant job of spanning both topics!
Watersports fantasy
“I don’t tell anybody about [the fact that I do] it,” confesses John, a man in his forties from Leicester who advertises online under the headline ‘PEE ON ME PLEASE’ “I don’t want to look bad. Some people think it’s horrible and revolting.”
John discovered he was into piss play when he saw it in a pornographic movie a few years ago and found himself aroused. He asked a woman he sometimes had casual sex with if she’d be into it and she was game but told him that she’d need to unwind by having sex first. So they made love and after she’d been on top of him for a while, “she said she was ready and then stood up and peed all over my stomach and penis while I masturbated,” says John. He came from the pee, but not from the actual intercourse. Later, in the shower, he peed on her nipples. Alas, that woman is now married and John’s current sexual partner isn’t as open to piss play. He told me that she looked truly shocked when he showed her a golden shower video, so he’s never brought up the subject of pissing on her again.
This is how John ended up posting his ‘pee on me please’ ad… an ad that, when we spoke, hadn’t attracted too many responses beyond a few women who said they’d be happy to pee all over him for a fee. This lack of action is probably why John tries his hardest to get any female who may respond to his ad to give the old pee play a try. “I can’t imagine,” he kept saying, “why a writer would feel like she could write about a topic without experiencing it herself.” I got the sense that he thought when I fully understood urophilia, I’d not take no for an answer and invite him over, bladder bursting, to show me what all the hype is about.
Why a number of people get sexually excited by the thought of pissing on someone or have someone piss on them is unclear. We can’t even say if this fetish is more common with men because, as Carla Blunt puts it, we live in a society “where women aren’t empowered to ask for what they want sexually.” It is known for certain, however, that our fascination with pee isn’t new.
Urine was extensively used in Ancient Rome, from invisible ink for secret messages—the supposed source of the term “read between the lines”—to teeth whitener. Piss was so important to Rome’s economy that those who sold it had to pay a special tax. Pee has also been a vital part of the arts.
The scenario of piss play that we understand the best is the idea that powerful men enjoy it because they’re sexually aroused when they’re dominated and sullied. But that concept only appears to be correct part of the time.
Sometimes people like this because they find getting defiled arousing. For other people, it has nothing to do with that and instead just feels wild and uninhibited and taboo without being dangerous. One thing experts do agree on is that its bullshit to suggest that having a pee fetish indicates that something disturbing or titillating happened to you during your childhood years.
The old Freudian view is that people are trying to resolve an ordeal, which might be true for some; however, something people fantasise about is usually something they associate with pleasure. There’s no common meaning [to this behaviour] since everyone’s going to come at it from a different angle. Some will find being pissed on demeaning, while others will see it as wanting more of that person.
Indeed, a former dominatrix I spoke to told me that one of her golden shower clients was a high-powered city broker and the other a sweet guy who carried around a small wooden fake toilet he’d had made. The geeky one would put the toilet on his face and she’d squat above it and let her golden liquid fall into his mouth while he moaned.
It seems like just as you develop a stereotype about whose into this fetish, another person comes along who disproves it. And that, of course, doesn’t take into account the many people who’d never come clean about their liking for piss. Carla Blunt told me a sex educator she knew held a class on the topic and it was the best-attended lecture he ever gave with the fewest questions asked.
Reading between those lines, potty-play could be, for many people, their best-kept secret!
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