5 things that a penis can’t actually do

5 things that a penis (c***) can’t actually do.

Penises cannot change the size of your vagina.

There are so many misrepresentations out there about penises and their rumoured capabilities. Penises really don’t have that much power, despite what some of their owners might think. Below are some things that a penis can’t actually do.

1. They can’t ascertain the worth of their sexual partners. What your penis or somebody else’s penis does in a vagina does not determine that person’s self-worth. Whether it’s one penis or twenty penises, consensual or otherwise, one’s value doesn’t begin and end with intercourse.

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2. It cannot change the size of a woman’s vagina. How the hell is a penis going to dramatically alter the elasticity of the vagina, when newborn babies come out of the vagina without turning the vagina into a loose, bottomless pit? A single penis, or even multiple penises, are not going to change the vagina’s ability to snap back into place.

3. Penises cannot lack self-control. We all joke about penises having a mind of their own, but an inappropriate boner doesn’t mean that people with penises have absolutely no control over their sexual urges. Someone doesn’t sexually assault somebody because their penis made them, they sexually assault somebody because they wanted to do it. Someone doesn’t cheat on their partner because their penis couldn’t control itself, they cheat on their partner because they want to.

4. It does not depend on size to guarantee good or bad sex. There isn’t really a connection. You can have terrible sex with somebody with an eight-inch penis, and great sex with somebody who is packing a four-inch penis. Sex is about more than just the whole in and out process.

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5. It cannot be too big for a condom. People come up with all kinds of excuses not to wear a condom, but using the “my penis is too big for a condom” excuse has to be the most pathetic. And if someone is seriously having trouble finding condoms that fit their massive penis, maybe just go online and find larger sizes elsewhere.

Heads-up:

Check out Dawn (63) from West Yorkshire. She’s a mature woman (if that’s your thing) with a body made for pleasure.

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Emma Valasco’s Bio:

Emma is a post-graduate sex therapist, acclaimed writer and guest blogger, as well as a self-confessed Dildo Diddler. Emma likes to write and talk about the things we have all grown to love, SEX and sexting. She has a naughty pussy, called Jess, and hates writing bios.

Search Emma’s blogs to find the answer to virtually any question you may have about sex and come through like a f****** champ.

Emma says: “Touch me… Yeah, like that, babe.”